Manners cost nothing?

I remember writing about people’s behaviour previously http://themelican.blogspot.com/2011/06/on-mission-to-find-manners.html and how basic manners seemed to be disappearing. 

Well it’s a number of years on and wow have things changed.

And not for the better.

Manners and concern for others at times feel like they’ve totally gone out the window. 

I regularly witness selfish drivers (and in fact dangerous drivers). People just go through a red light, cut people up, and we’ve found our baby on board stickers in the back of the car make no difference whatsoever. Well, my fiancé used to drive ambulances and still experienced this behaviour so clearly nothing has an impact! I don’t drive and to be honest I think I’d be scared too nowadays anyway! 

Walking down a high street so many people walk right at you, push in front when there’s a queue or don’t apologise if they knock into you. 

Having a big tandem buggy and a toddler in tow at times I am conscious I take up a lot of the pavement. I try to make sure we move out the way as often as we can. But do you know what? Many a time I wish I hadn’t bothered because it’s rare we get a thank you or any acknowledgement.

I’ve been struggling along before now with all the kids and people - who could easily have moved - have made me struggle to get past rather than them moving slightly out the way. 

Take the recent debate on parent and child car park spaces - the number of times I’ve seen people in these that don’t have any children. People just don’t care. It’s all about what suits them. 

Funny enough on the way to Baby Sensory today we came to a narrowing of the path and I instinctively stopped walking with the pram and let a lady through. She stared at the twins and ignored me. Nice.

When did manners become such a novelty? 

It’s one of the things we’re very keen on as parents to instil in our children to be kind and polite. To me it’s a basic standard way to behave and I still to this day find it shocking when others are clearly not of this belief. 

How hard is it to say thank you, please, sorry? 

Am I being a stereotypical queue-loving rule-abiding Brit here? Are manners old fashioned now? A thing of the past?

Who decided it wasn’t necessary to be polite anymore? 

Is it a similar case to what happens as a commuter? I used to dread seeing people I knew on the commute when I was at work as I turned into this short tempered huffing rushing beast. People clambered to get on tubes, rushed for a seat and you ended up mirroring their behaviour in some sort of survival mode technique. 

So do people see others not using manners and end up simply replicating that behaviour? 

Is this trend going to revert and manners will come back ‘in fashion’? Or are we going to find things get increasingly worse? I truly hope not. 

So what do you think? Are manners important anymore? Let me know your thoughts. Erm...please. Thank you. 

Disgust on the District Line

I’ve blogged before about manners and where have they disappeared to in the UK?

However, something happened on Monday to get my week off to a cracking start!

Since moving I now have to travel a different way into work. Those of you from the London area will have heard of the 2 routes I’ll refer to, for those of you who don’t I’ll try paint a picture.

In a previous company I had to travel on the district line, part of the London underground, I’d then change and get another underground train. When I moved to my current company over three years ago I could travel in using National Rail – an overground train which has set scheduled train times.

Typically the District line is cramped, full of rude people and always seems to smell or have some sort of unpleasant experience happen on it. The rail train tended to seem more pleasant, although I soon found you got your fair share of rude people on there too (think arrogant businessman barging into everyone or whiny chav talking super loud about their private life).

When I moved I realised my routine of getting the overground train was going to change and I was going to be back to the good old District Line, I won’t lie I was dreading it. It always has delays and always makes me feel sweaty and dirty on disembarking.

However, for most of the journeys in the last few weeks (bar this week) it has actually not been quite as bad as I remembered and in fact I quite liked the slightly longer time on the train as it gives me time to read my book for longer and catch up on work emails on my way in at times before we go into tunnels.

On Monday though, my experience was not so good. In fact it was probably one of if not the worst time I’ve had on my commute in. And to be fair to TfL for once it was nothing to do with them.

It was a passenger.

Thankfully we were only a few stops from where I need to get off.

I was sitting minding my own business reading my Kindle when I heard an odd noise – it sounded like a child. Then I noticed people looking in the direction of the noise (the carriage was pretty packed as usual) and they looked a bit uncomfortable to put it politely.

Eventually I turn my head to look through the gap in the crowds and I see what this unpleasant sight is…

A Mum with her little boy and girl. The little boy had clearly been taken ill as they’d stepped on the train. He was being sick. Obviously he can’t help that.

The Mum? She was just standing there letting him being sick on the floor. Then she started to just hold a tissue out.

You can imagine the scene and the mess. It was horrible.

The best bit of this tale? The Mum proceeded to dump the dirty tissues straight on the carriage floor around people.

Then when we arrived at the next stop? She just got off, took her children with her and left the rest of us in the carriage to the mess. Nice.

An older gentlemen then found some old newspaper and just covered things up.

Now, I know the child can’t help being ill. I am not one of these people that sneers at children on the train (well not unless I’m in a real grumpy mood!)

However, as the adult in the situation I couldn’t believe how the woman was not more aware of what was happening, other people, the germs, not to mention her little boy standing there openly vomiting on to the floor.

My tummy flipped over quite a few times and I did start to wonder if I’d be next. You’ll be pleased to know I wasn’t.

It just got me thinking again though about thinking of others and common courtesy. The way the mother behaved and also the passengers at that end of the carriage, I realised nobody offered the little boy their seat whilst he was unwell either.

Are we just becoming a society now of everyone for themselves and looking out for number one? I sincerely hope not.

Still, we’re approaching Christmas now so perhaps all these festive ads everyone harps on about will help warm people’s hearts and get them thinking of people around them and not just themselves…

Selfish? Me?

A thought for the day.

I'm always having a whinge about other people nowadays. How rude people are with their manners and mainly how selfish they are.

Common courtesy and helping others tends to go out the window a lot now.

Everyone seems to be worried about what's in it for me. 

At work we often get annoyed how someone couldn't take time out just to reply to emails or update us.

Me and my fiancé get frustrated at the selfish people who never let us drive out of our turning where I live.

Today I was due to meet my old closest university friend at Stratford Westfield for a long awaited catch up.

A few hours before we were due to meet I checked the National Rail app and found the trains had delays. The extent of those delays kept changing.

I noticed the reason for the delays - a person had been hit by a train at Ilford.

I let my friend know and we tried to see if we could still meet.

In the end we postponed our catch up.

We were both fuming.

I took to Twitter to complain - of course! - and the rail company Tweeted me back with the reason. 

All day I've been moaning about my plans being cancelled.

The fact is someone got hit by a train today and can only imagine they sadly lost their life. A family lost a loved one.

Did I stop to consider that? 

All I've been worried about is moaning about my plans.

Who's the selfish one now? 

Nosy neighbour

I am on the train home. I should be reading a book on my Kindle, but yet again I've been distracted.

Why am I now writing a blog instead?

What exactly has distracted me?

The two women sat near to me that's what.

They're talking about a load of rubbish and gossip, but I can't stop listening.

If you're interested they've spoken about getting a mole removed, friends, reading something and gossiped about the guy nearby letting a girl sit down in the seats rather than him!

I was also getting distracted/a bit annoyed by one of them messaging on their phone and the little noises it was making as she received a new message through.

Yes I'm nosey.

All the time.

Many a time I've been caught out openly staring at people as they chat on the train, honestly I probably look like I'm part of the group!

I can recall years back at work people laughing at me as they caught me listening in to their conversation next to me.

What is it that makes us nosey?

I've started twitching the blinds when I've heard people arguing outside. 

Ooh they're talking about relationships now, I think one of them is having trouble in her marriage...

Sorry!

I know when I go for lunch or drinks with my Auntie she's the super nosy parker, always checking out people nearby.

We've been in coffee shops before and stupidly sat next to the window, we couldn't hold a chat for more than 2 minutes before we were nosing outside!

Oh no, one of them is teary now. Awkward.

Sorry!

If I can see a text in front of me on someone's screen if they are on the bus I can't help but look.

Yet I get so miffed if someone dares listen in to me! 

Haha one of the women has said what a horrible noise the phone makes! 

Oh she's reading Lee Child's apparently.

They're deciding if they're having a glass of wine now when they get off.

Okay enough is enough! I'm off to see what else I can nose in on now, only two stops left after all!! Ooh and I think they're getting off at my stop...

Sunbed saving syndrome

Wow. Nearly two weeks since I last blogged. Even then it was a book review.

I've been pretty busy of late. What with work, social life and diet/fitness!

To be honest the blog has gone at the bottom of the pile (well it's not even made the pile if I'm honest!) That is until the last day or so when various people - whether friends, family or work colleagues/friends - have all commented on the fact the blog has gone so quiet.

Nothing like a reminder people actually do like what you do (well at least read it) to give you a much needed kick up the backside!

So here I am. I'm hurriedly typing away on my iPhone on the train home after rushing out the office to make sure I left on time and attempted to get an earlier train back. The reason being? Spinning.

My diet/exercise/weight journey has been somewhat mixed of late, due mostly to my stress levels being increased and my personal time being decreased. End result? Default reaction of being lazy and stuffing my face with food and booze of course.

I've had the usual confusion, doing less exercise one week and not being as strict with healthy eating then seeing a big weight loss. Or this week's fascinating result after two days of exercise only and five days of bad food and booze, resulting in no weight gained at all! How does that work??

Today I have been walking a tad duck-like and wincing as I walk, all thanks to one reason. Yesterday I went for a 5k run outside. I've not done this for over a month and don't get me wrong it was nice to do for a change and to be in the fresh air.

However the reason I went for a run, well HAD to go for a run does not amuse me.

Readers, followers, friends, let me introduce you to Sunbed Saving Syndrome.

You know those annoying people when you're on a typical package holiday who get up at the crack of dawn, chuck their garish towel over a sunlounger round the pool and then sod off for half the morning elsewhere?

Irritated already at the thought? Me too.

Well, how great to find the same thing is now happening at spinning, with the bikes.

Granted, people used to put a towel or bottle on a bike to save it just before a class, or the odd annoying person would leave something of theirs over a bike and come back in the studio mere minutes before spinning began, but it was a minority.

Now it seems every bloody muppet is doing it! Meaning you have to get to a class earlier and earlier and if like me you dare to have a job and can't get there early you are left with one of the (ever increasing) bikes that wobbles, squeaks, has a resistance dial that doesn't work etc.

This was already causing me to rant. We all know I love a good moan.

Yesterday however was the final straw for me. I got up early on a Sunday morning, I got to the class about 20 minutes early and there were NO BIKES.

Every single bike was covered in a towel, water bottle or blue roll. And there was not one single person to be seen.

All the bikes had been 'saved' like aforementioned sunloungers by people that weren't even there.

So we had to leave the studio without spinning.

The gym has the option to have a sign up system but currently only does this on one of the six classes on offer.

I'm now off to attempt tonight's class and the gym staff be warned if I don't get in tonight I will not be simply leaving the gym and taking this lying down. Oh no, true British tourist loudmouth behaviour will be well in force!

Be warned!

Spinners Anonymous

I love spinning. We all know this. In fact I'm probably a little addicted I admit.

However tonight tested me somewhat.

I always have to rush to the gym in order to get to the class in time. What makes it worse is that people 'reserve' a bike for themselves. Often they do this way in advance of the class and what drives me insane is that they then turn up last minute or late to the session!

This annoys me usually, but today after getting hot and bothered on the train it was bound to get to me even more tonight.

What made it worse today is that on the Tuesday class you have to put your name down and reserve your place. Which I always do.

Off I rush to the studio today, thankful for the cold air con in the gym. I get in the studio, it's boiling and every bike has people's towels/bottles etc on them, those that don't have the dreaded blue roll on it.

I've gone regularly to the class the last few weeks and always put my name down and turned up. Apparently this means absolutely nothing.

I could not seem to find one spinning bike that was free and the instructor wasn't in the room yet. Off I went downstairs to reception where a really helpful member of staff told me if my name is down ignore the blue roll and pick a bike. End of.

I returned upstairs happy and swiftly moved over to a bike, noticing the instructor was now there...and he was watching me.

"Er that bikes taken"

I hastily told him about my visit downstairs and what they said (and note this was a few minutes before class starts and said bike 'owner' was still not there). I even mentioned how often I go to the class and always make sure I put my name down.

"But this one's taken. Sorry"

At this point my blood was starting to boil. Believe me the way I feel lately I am not in the mood to have people mess me about.

Thankfully - for my insanity and moreso the safety of the instructor - there was one lone bike spare at the back, which he encouraged me towards.

I shot him a dirty look, huffed a bit and then set myself up on this spinning bicycle.

It took me a good ten minutes into the session to stop shooting him angry looks (its in the dark so this was a tad pointless, but it made me feel better!) Eventually I did calm down and made the most of the session.

I just hope that next week it doesn't happen again.

Yes that's right I'm going back next week, I put my name down and I'm going to grace this instructor with my presence again.

The honest reason being because quite frankly I love this man's class, it's fun and he pushes you hard, but in an enjoyable way. Plus Thailand is coming up and I don't have long left to get in shape, there aren't many classes left.

I truly am a sucker for spinning.

Riding rant

I think we all know I’ve got just a tad obsessed with spinning lately. This week and the future plan now being to go to spin class every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday! In fact I’m even considering investing in a pain of padded cycling trousers – what with the bike and then the horse riding saddle on a Sunday – it is not comfortable!

Obviously my cycling exploits are limited to that of the stationary bikes downstairs in the gym and specialist spin machines in the studio upstairs, rather than venturing out on a ‘real’ bicycle. In fact the last time I settled my feet onto some actual bike pedals was around seven years ago when I was in Australia and participated in the Wobbly Wine Tour (great fun, really recommend it!)

Given the fact I hadn’t ridden a bike since I was a teenager (ah memories of cycling round the local estates with one of my best friends come flooding back), I was impressively wobbly before I’d even consumed any alcohol! Strangely enough that was my first and last return to riding a proper bike since.

What has my sudden love of spinning got to do with anything, you ask? Why am I typing away about this hobby yet again? I’m afraid the reason is I’m preparing to rant, as yet again something happened whilst I was out of the office at work today which is becoming a regular occurrence.

Those who do cycle and are very good at it, I have nothing against them, particularly people who do it for fitness - choosing to cycle rather than tube or bus it to work – or those who cycle miles for charity events.

However, what I don’t like is the seemingly growing number of cyclists who are a law unto themselves. You know the ones I mean, they undertake you in the car, they go storming across red lights and they travel on the road one minute and the pavement the next.

My rant is mostly aimed at those on standard bicycles, although I’ve had my share of moron motorcyclists too believe me. On a drive to the station to get to work my boyfriend and I had a motorbike try and come down the side of the car despite seeing my boyfriend signalling to go right, when they swerved past – and cut him up – the passenger turned round giving us evils and the finger! Nice.

At least I’ve found them to follow the rules of the road to the extent they don’t cut the lights though – or in my experience so far. Cyclists ever-increasingly, particularly in London just do as they please.

I noticed a colleague the other day on social media complain they were walking along and had headphones in and had stopped to look at their phone or something and a cyclist just missed them. Nearly every day when I go to cross Bishopsgate or Commercial Street on the way to or from the office I see a cyclist go speeding through a red light. Quite often they ring their bell continuously and have the cheek to shout out complaints at the pedestrians crossing over at the time too.

What angers me even more is the whole campaign about looking out for cyclists and how drivers should be careful not to run them down or knock them over. Perhaps if more people followed the rules of the road correctly that would help for a start (as a non-driver I acknowledge there are plenty of drivers out there who aren’t so good at this too granted).

Maybe a more realistic campaign would be to warn pedestrians to look out for cyclists as they may well be run down by them. If you’re not a child you need to ride on the road, if you’re going to ride on the road you need to follow the general rules of the road. Simple.

Why is it cyclists think they can create their own rules and do as they please? And as for those that go speeding along the pavement and nearly knock into you as you walk along, to then return to the road when they’re good and ready again? How is that acceptable?

How can people plead for more courtesy on the roads, when they don’t follow that form of behaviour themselves?

I’m going to stick to my bike that is firmly secured to the ground for now and just pedal as fast as I can in the dark to flashing lights and beat-filled music. As for investing in some bottom protecting cycling gear, perhaps I’d be better paying out for some protective equipment to keep me safe travelling to and from work as I cross the roads instead.

Weekend workouts

Day 12 and I am pleased to report I can actually walk today and sneeze without groaning in pain!

I gave Ms Michaels and her workout another go last night and thankfully found it a bit easier going than last time, PLUS my abs don't seem too bad today either!

Of course the downside to this is now I'm questioning whether I pushed myself hard enough last night. Taking into account the whole no pain no gain mantra and everything. I guess we'll know come Monday morning...

I'm also pleased to say my mentality is gradually changing. On viewing a big juicy meaty burger on TV last night covered in cheese and bacon I didn't feel tempted by it. My stomach didn't grumble in hunger and I didn't crave junk food. Good progress I feel.

My mood seems better today so perhaps I am adjusting to this lower caffeine intake too.

I've even requested a set low fat 'diet' dinner at my parents for our visit tomorrow and am finding out the meal at the in-laws Sunday so I can plan my points accordingly. Throw in two planned gym sessions and some exercise tonight and I'm hoping I'll show the scales who's boss come weigh in number two!

Me and the boyfriend have been bickering a bit though. I think perhaps a bit of friendly weight loss rivalry might be going on here. Sure that can only help but motivate us though, so shan't complain.

In other positive news, baby number three out of my friends of expectant parents have arrived! A lovely little girl was born yesterday, their first child. Exciting times. And the hen party plans are slowly coming together for my friend's wedding this year...so far so good.

The only downside I have to say is people's negativity so far this year, I've come across it in lots of places and am not impressed. Particularly the train commuters who must of all got 'How to be a complete a******e' books for Christmas! If it's not pushing, coughing over everyone or barging you out the way, it's playing their music without headphones or leaning their bag on your shoulder.

Oh well, back to the office for me now. Just under four hours to go and it's the weekend!!

Bloggers Block

Whether it’s down to my head being crammed full of facts, names and processes from my new role, or that my creative juices have temporarily stopped flowing, I can’t seem to write my blog.

I feel a bit like I’ve neglected it lately and it was only conversations at work this week that reminded me of its presence and my lack of contributions. So I’m afraid this post is going to be rather random and filled with a bit of a mix.

So I guess I should start by updating you on my new job. I’ve now done 8 days at my new company and I am genuinely really enjoying it – much to my relief. After all it would have been a bit of a slap in the face to go somewhere new and find you enjoy it less than the previous job you left. It’s also highlighted how little things in life really can make a big difference – things like ‘proper’ mugs to drink out of, not cardboard cups; a sense of general trust in employees and a friendly, approachable nature from management (on all levels).

My boyfriend has found it quite comical – and a reflection of my previous company – how impressed I am by what some people will argue is behaviour almost to be expected by employers. I guess perhaps still being in the new person and learning stage my view may also be somewhat skewed too!

In other areas of my life, I will find myself in the last year of my 20s after this Saturday. A very scary thought indeed. To be honest I have been so caught up in starting my new job and issues with my boyfriend’s career that I’ve not built my birthday up as much as I normally would.

I am a bit of a nightmare when it comes to birthdays, I believe this is down to having such a small family, when one of us has a birthday we like to make a big fuss. I have been known to celebrate my birthdays over a number of days and in fact when I was 25 I had 5 consecutive days of various celebrations. Tip – don’t have your work birthday drinks as the final night of birthday events if you choose to do this, it gets very messy and you will be extremely hungover the next day.

This year I’ve made no arrangements, partly because I’ve not had time and also because my boyfriend has something planned for Saturday – this is all a complete surprise though, so I don’t know what he has in store… I only arranged to go out for a meal and drinks tomorrow night with a close friend a few days ago and that was after my poor friend had to nudge me on it numerous times. I do wonder is this also possibly my way of denying my age and that this is the last year of my 20s, it just doesn’t feel real.

When I think back to being young, back then if I saw someone 30 years of age they seemed so grown up and pretty much sorted – good job, married, own a nice big house, have kids. I didn’t know what, but I was fairly confident in the fact that they had achieved something with their lives. When you get to this age you can’t help but question are you where you should be and have you done and seen enough? I will worry about that after my birthday, else I fear I will spend the day moping about the things I could have done and not what I have done with my life.
I’ve also thought about life and being young with the recent violence and looting in London and across the UK. It saddens me to think this is our future society and although I know this is not necessarily a reflection of the majority of young people today, I’ve seen enough evidence of how teens and schoolchildren feel they can act to know things are different now.

Who knows perhaps again this is further evidence of me getting older. I know for a fact I’ve started doing the whole ‘when I was young…’ phrasing and labelling young girls and boys wearing hoodies or in big groups as ‘yobs’. I just really do feel that things have changed and just general respect and accountability of actions is lacking somewhat nowadays.

I am ‘friends’ on Facebook with some young people – generally distant family members linked to me or my boyfriend, and I find I don’t like looking at their profiles. The girls look too made up and too grown up, the boys have ridiculous levels of bad language on their walls or are using terminology which I’d associate with ‘chavs’.

Even the things our 6 year old nephew is aware of shocks me sometimes, just the general information or terms they pick up simply being around other children at school is insane. I just remember being in more of a bubble when I was young and enjoying the magic of childhood, rather than rushing to become an adult – well at least until I was about 13+ anyway.

The other concern I’ve had of late is my weight (yes, yet again). My whole healthy eating, exercise regime has gone well and truly out the window and I need to quickly establish a routine so I can get myself sorted again. I am actually going to see if I can use my gym membership in the same chain near my office – talks of early morning or lunchtime workouts have been heard, now it’s just a case of making them happen…

It’s just the area I’m based in now – around Spitalfields, near Shoreditch etc, everyone is so skinny and trendy. Seriously, this whole area is not doing anything for my confidence, I feel like an old granny and that I can’t quite work out what to wear – something I’ve never felt before to be honest. I thought how great it was that in this company we could wear what we want (within reason obviously) in the office, but it does add another factor to worry about each week.

So there you have it, I’ve turned into an ageing, judgemental, plump, frumpily-dressed woman on the speedy downward slope to 30. Happy days. I tell you something though, if you need me to talk about work orders, outlines, corporate websites or the best train to get from Romford to Liverpool Street then I’m your lady!

On a mission to find manners

After yet another unpleasant encounter with one of the typical ‘charming’ travellers on the District Line this morning I am in a bad mood and getting all worked up about people and their lack of manners.

Why is it that increasingly people seem to have some form of allergy to basic, simple manners? You know that completely out there idea of holding a door open for someone if they are behind you, rather than letting it slam in their face. Or perhaps even when driving round a roundabout actually switching on that great invention on your car which indicates what direction you’re going, instead of potentially causing an accident and leaving others around you to just guess your intentions. No? Too much effort, can’t be bothered? Thought so.

The main thing I hate about bad manners – particularly those found on the commute – is that it starts to affect you and you find yourself becoming that miserable monster tutting, pushing and huffing your way through your journey. I often think to myself I hope I don’t see anyone I know on the train as I’d be embarrassed by my miserable demeanour and tunnel vision approach to getting home.

One thing that really gets me is people not saying thank you. I like to think of myself as quite a helpful person, particularly in the workplace, but the amount of times I’ve gone out my way to help people (particularly when others wouldn’t) and not got one measly thank you...

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want a medal for being a decent human being, but just on the odd occasion a rare expression of gratitude would just make my day that little bit nicer.

Perhaps it’s because I am quite polite myself and am very conscious of saying thank you. I used to be friends with such a rude girl, who led to all sorts of embarrassment for us when we went out for meals/drinks because of her abrupt attitude to any waiting staff she encountered. No thank you was ever offered, each menu grabbed out their hands, no smile ever passed her lips. Awful.

My boyfriend is also great with his manners, so much so that he ends up apologising to people when it’s not his fault – say for example people barge into him in the street or on public transport. This is something that really bothers me for some bizarre reason and I can often be seeing telling him off for apologising when he’s done absolutely nothing wrong.

Why then for most people is saying sorry so hard? Being a bit of a stubborn character (only child, Leo starsign, need I say more) I myself am guilty of this if I get into an argument with family/friends, I just can’t bring myself to admit I’m in the wrong and it takes a long while for me to calm down and see things logically. Although if I were to accidentally tread on someone’s foot on the train, knock someone in a shop, or feel I was being awkward in my food order in a restaurant, I’d be the first to apologise.

Yet every day I come into contact with numerous people who let people down, take advantage, disrupt people’s working schedules, knock people on the train and more, but say nothing. Absolutely nothing. To me it should be like the word sorry comes out your mouth on auto pilot whenever you do anything wrong, it’s not like it requires a lot of effort.

What’s the answer to this rude society we live in then? Do we need to go back to having people attend finishing schools so they know the right way to carry themselves throughout life? On having a nose online the most popular results coming up are sites advising parents how to teach their children good manners and obviously this is where it all starts and how a precedent is set for how to behave. It seems to me though people need some form of lessons as they get older, a refresher course if you were of good manners and etiquette. This site offers advice on how to teach adults good manners if they are lacking for instance. And interestingly these findings show that psychologists are saying thank you is actually good for us!

So go on, take your time walking to the train station tonight, let someone next to you go in front and board the bus first, smile and thank your waiter if you eat out and give your partner a big hug and apologise for all the times you have been in the wrong. We all want to get home after work or make it to our destination as soon as we can, we’re all tired from a hard day and we’re all likely to be fed up with something – be it our jobs, our financial situation, a family issue. Instead of taking your frustration out on others though, step back and take a deep breath and think of how you’re feeling and how you’d like to be treated. Who knows perhaps tomorrow morning you’ll find you’re the one who gets offered that seat or receives that thank you card for your kind efforts.