Friday, 13 June 2014

Fitness fakers

When you think about going to the gym and the essentials needed what do you think of?

Your gym kit, bag, water and a towel?

Or rather is your fake tan topped up, your makeup thickly applied, your best gym gear and revealing outfit packed, along with your designer sunglasses?

I often on a Saturday morning roll out of bed, put my gym kit on and head straight to the spin class, so you can tell which camp I’m from…

Yes, I will have makeup on if I’ve gone for a workout straight from work, but that is the only reason why.

Yet attending my local gym recently I felt like I’ve been surrounded by bronzed-up gym bunnies and arrogant muscle meatheads.

Don’t get me wrong if I had a hot body I too would want to flaunt it and show off how the hard work had paid off.

However, often these people are rude, bowling through the building and barely break a sweat as they wander round the machines not really doing much at all.

Take my spin class, some females have been known to whoop throughout as if they are out clubbing. Now I’m not a complete bore here, when you really get into it sometimes the instructor makes noises and gets everyone going, but an individual doing it on their own when nobody else in the class is of that nature is just cringey.

One lady recently rudely shouted out to the instructor “Oi turn the music up, I can’t ‘ear it!” Charming.

As for the men. What exactly is the point of going to the gym to hog a weights machine and sit on it in your jeans with your woolly beanie on chatting to your mates about your next night out? Or lifting weights that are clearly far too heavy for you and then simply letting them drop with an almighty clang on the floor? Don’t even get me started on the grunts and groans!

And if you dare to walk in their pathway don’t expect them to move. Oh no, they own the gym didn’t you know? They are the kings and queens of the faux fitness world so you better all move around them.

My fiancé has ended up in a coughing fit on the treadmills after a girl jumped on a treadmill directly next to him (there were loads spare, another pet hate!) and had so much perfume on she affected all the surrounding air.

Also I’m sure you’ve experienced the people on their phones (despite numerous signs saying you shouldn’t use them) on the treadmill and bikes? Or the friends in matching Juicy-esque tracksuits side by side on the treadmills having a conversation the entire time.

Now correct me if I’m wrong, but is a gym not a place to get fit, lose weight and work out?

Apparently, it’s actually the place to go to ‘check in’ on Facebook and let people know you’re at the gym yet again, but in fact you are there to pose. I’m all for fitness having a social element and people having workout buddies and really embracing the healthy lifestyle. An hour plus of wandering around chatting and eyeing up the similar ‘talent’ is a whole other world.

In another spin class, I was in the middle of stretching at the end when I had to let 2 or more people past (of course they’re ‘too cool’ to stretch!). The best was my return to the ladies changing room to find one female standing in front of the mirror preening. She was literally standing admiring herself – checking out her bum, her tummy and pouting!

She then proceeded to leave the gym in her leopard print hat, skin tight outfit, fake tanned skin and huge sunglasses (worn inside of course!).

Since when did gyms become more about showing off than shedding fat? Flaunting the fact you are ‘fit’ in the attractive sense, not health-wise?

Do you experience this at your gym? Or is it just an Essex thing?...


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