Remembering me

Sometimes when you become a parent - and indeed when general adult life gets busy overall - you can lose track of what it is that makes you you. 

What have you been up to lately? So, what are your hobbies? Often when I get asked these questions nowadays I get a bit stuck - erm...not much, I can’t remember, I don’t really have time to have any...

But that’s sort of wrong. I know deep down I need to make time and not give in so easily to Mum guilt or give excuses not to do things for me.

This month I knew was going to involve a few well overdue days/evenings having fun. Fun for me that is - not laughing at my kids being crazy, smiling at something cute they’ve done, or enjoying watching them making me proud. 

The month’s not over yet and I have to admit so far it’s been great. My bank balance and figure won’t thank me, but it’s been so nice to indulge in a few things I enjoy. 

Eating out

Theatre

Film

Music 

Friends 

Dating

Reading 

I had a girl’s night out at the start of the month, it’s been a very long time since I’ve got together for a girly one and it was great. A perfect combination of drinks, chatting, nice food and a good dance/sing to some ‘classics’. I can’t sing or dance great let’s be honest, but nothing does me the world of good more than a drink or two and dancing like a loon and ‘singing’ along to some old garage songs I used to love when I went clubbing when younger! 

I’ve eaten a gorgeous afternoon tea in London at a swish hotel, gastropub family birthday lunch, tasty bistro birthday meal, a late night ‘fancy’ burger and a steak dinner. All bar one were child free too which make the world of difference as for a change I could take my time, enjoy the flavours and savour my food! 

I watched the Tina Turner musical in the West End which I’ve wanted to see for a while - again I really like a good musical or simply a play at the theatre. This tends to be an annual visit nowadays so I think I appreciate and enjoy it even moreso. The musical was amazing - so much energy and emotion in the performance, it certainly didn’t disappoint. 

My fiancé and I couldn’t properly remember the last film we saw at the cinema and thanks to my in-laws we ended up seeing two films when we went out. Again - as with good music, good books (I’ve been getting into my reading again finally of a night before going to sleep) and a good play/show - I find films great escapism, a fun way to switch off and forget real life for a bit. We had a good mix of a lighthearted kids story and then a more adult Tarantino film. 

And speaking of my fiancé, we’ve had some time just us for a change, which is very rare and makes the world of difference. It’s so hard to even get in a brief conversation most the time - hence why our to do lists and social planing are always so behind! 

Oh and a bit of a lay in and breakfast in bed weren’t all that bad either! Sleep is extremely underrated pre-parenthood! 

I’ve still got a couple more things ahead too - a night out with friends and my fiancé at a ‘silent disco’ and a girly night out with a difference with my Mum, and mother and sister-in-law! I can’t wait!

Before kids we used to go out lots more and my fiancé would find new places to visit (immersive Alice in Wonderland was one, themed afternoon teas, music gigs, stand up shows). I love music gigs, live comedy and things that are a bit different and so I’m going to see if we can both really try to make more of an effort to invest in planning more regular time for us to enjoy these things again. 

Even if it’s a once every few months event, and we have to wait until our budget allows, we need to make sure we’re not missing out. 

Just a few moments rediscovering things I enjoy has made me feel so much like me again and reminded me who I am. And let’s not forget I’ve got to get back on that spinning bike as it’s been a while again now - if only to work off the after effects of all this ‘rediscovery’! 

Super song addict

Have you ever heard a song and liked it so much you just have to keep listening to it?

It’s always in your head?

You find yourself humming it absentmindedly?

You play it and then you need to play it again straight after?

You can’t listen to it without singing along?

My name’s Mel and I have a song addiction.

Towards the end of last year I was in the car with my fiancé and a song came on the radio, I of course did my classic groan and then shriek ‘Oh I LOVE this song!’

I’ve since realised how annoying I am in the car with him (I’m surprised he’s lasted 9 years+) but if there is a song I like playing in the car I have to sing to it. Well try to sing, I have an awful voice.

This particular evening he told me how annoying I am and proceeded to crank the volume up to drown me out.

The song? Don’t Let Go, by En Vogue. I’ve not heard it in years, but it brought back so many memories from when I was young and is a proper ‘hairbrush song’ (you know, when you’re young and you sing dramatically into a hairbrush some other microphone-alternative item?)

After wailing and shrieking along to it in the car I then obsessed about it all evening and proceeded to check my iPod. What?! It’s not on there?!

So I looked on iTunes.

Oh dear…I then found Greatest Hits of En Vogue and remembered some other ‘classics’. A few minutes later and the album was on my iPod!

And since? Well when my fiancé is out and I’m along on goes the iPod dock and the song gets played on loop until I get embarrassed that my next door neighbours can hear.

I then told one of my team at work about my dilemma and ended up playing it 3 times in a row whilst at work – well you’ve somehow got to brighten up all those spreadsheets!

This is not the first time this has happened, other classics I can remember are Jennifer Paige’s Crush which old Uni flatmates of mine will remember I used to play weirdly when me and my boyfriend of the time had an argument and he’d stormed off home. Ah the random things you do when young…

I also got a tad obsessed with Kasabian’s Fire for quite some time too.

I’m sure there are many others too.

So what is it that makes certain songs stick in our head and appeal so much? And why is it you feel the need to keep playing and playing and playing the song before eventually (and I’m talking a long time here) it starts to grate on you and you get fed up?

And more importantly, please help me out here and tell me I’m not the only this happens to?

Anyone?...

Melican on Music: Kaiser Chiefs at the Hammersmith Apollo

This Thursday a tad hungover and pretty sleepy I found myself at the Hammersmith Apollo to see the Kaiser Chiefs. The last UK date in their Future is Medieval tour, this was the third gig of theirs I've been to. I've seen the band a number of times at various festivals like V and Isle of Wight, as well as their own performances at Wembley and Earls Court. It has to be said they are one of my favourite bands.

I think most people have recognised the band has dipped in popularity over the years and hasn't appeared in the charts for a while, the last big memorable song of theirs which attracted a more mainstream crowd being Ruby. And I have to add I've just shocked myself when looking this up and realising that was in 2007!

Regardless I really like them and better than listening to their albums, I think they are fantastic live. Whether they are in the mainstream or not they certainly still have a big following. Ricky Wilson is a superb frontman and knows how to work a crowd (in my humble opinion). Seeing them this week just proved how popular they are yet again and the power he has over said crowd.

The guys opened up with Everyday I Love You Less and Less, which got the crowd going after a pretty slow start from two support acts on the stage beforehand.

Actually skipping back a bit when the support Fixers and Frankie and the Heartstrings were on, me and my boyfriend were feeling a little boring. Looking around the venue (which I must say is one of my favourites) we noticed how 'old' the crowd were, most people were our age or older and I have to admit I started to feel a little old myself on noticing this. We worried is the music we're into now the sort of thing older audiences like, have we crossed that line and are no longer into actual modern music?? We were also yawning as both of us were tired and the support acts I hate to say didn't really spark our excitement.

I knew this wouldn't matter though as whenever I've seen the Leeds indie band themselves I've not failed to jump around, shout, scream and have a great time!

Admittedly before the gig I had the new album but haven't really listened to it - this isn't a reflection on the Kaiser Chiefs, I am so bad at actually listening to albums after getting them - and so far I hadn't found any songs that jumped out at me.

The band did a good mix of classic hits, new tracks and songs off the album the tour was based on. Hearing it all live I found I liked every song and the set seemed to go pretty quickly. Best bits for me were of course Ruby, Love's Not A Competition But I'm Winning, Oh My God, The Angry Mob, the new Listen To Your Head, Ricky go up into the circle to sing and lots more.

We're known amongst friends for going to a lot of a gigs, but sadly this was our first gig of 2012 and at present is our only gig. Last year we saw Stereophonics, Rihanna, Foo Fighters, Take That, Kasabian and we went to the Isle of Wight Festival where we saw a whole array of artists. I recently went to sample some garage and old tunes at Kisstory at the Indigo2, but don't have anything else booked up as yet. I'm rather envious actually that my boyfriend is off to see Noel Gallagher tomorrow at the o2 with one of his close friends.

So I can't compare the Kaisers gig to anything else this year really, but comparisons aside it was a great gig, testament to this is the fact I enjoyed it so much and had so much energy when they were on despite my tiredness and hangover! Let's hope I get to go to some more gigs this year to tell you about!

Treadmill tunes

Something happened to me today. I woke up and then spent an hour reading in bed, before falling back to sleep. As a result I felt quite lethargic when it came to getting up and must admit I was expecting to find today's gym workout pretty hard going.

We didn't get to the gym until midday, which in a way was nice as it wasn't too busy. I'd only had one weetabix and a cup of coffee (I normally have two before the gym, but there was only one left).

So we set out on the treadmill, on day 13 now of this healthy eating/exercise. My boyfriend informed me he was going for 40 minutes or so on there, but I expected to do around 20 minutes or so.

Anyways, as I said something happened to me. After a five minute warm up walk I then went into a run. Around ten minutes into the running I felt my triband starting to hurt and I was tiring (I normally only do about 15 minutes running). However, I decided to push on with it and managed a 20 minute run - thanks to The Saturdays, Maroon 5 and Rihanna!

I then went for a brisk steep hill walk and rather than feeling tired out I actually felt another bit of energy coming back. So I switched on the Foo's Pretender and managed to do more running and at a faster speed. I felt great.

I therefore ended up with a 45 minute session on the treadmill, then moved on to the bike. Again I seemed to get a huge burst of energy return, which increased once I had some garage tunes playing in my ears. After 20 minutes I did a brief 5 minutes on the rower but again managed to push myself harder and faster there too.

The power of music in exercise truly is amazing. I've had this before though and at one point found a couple of new Take That songs made me run faster (odd I know!)

However, I have never had such bursts of energy like I did today. I don't know am I just getting fitter, did that extra bit of sleep help me out or was it just a new selection of music? I'm back in the gym again tomorrow, so we shall see.

The weird thing is that I'm also always starving after a gym session, today though I didn't feel hungry. I've had a low fat soup and ryvitas and don't get me wrong it was nice, but I still didn't feel that hungry or that I needed it.

I really don't know what's come over me. Fingers crossed I'm getting fitter and getting used to eating less. Either that or music is even more powerful than I thought and helps curb your appetite too!!

Nasty Factor

I am sitting here watching X Factor on a Saturday night – sad I know and even sadder that I was pleased I am in tonight to see it. However, I am just so annoyed I had to blog about it.

Recently in the press I saw reports where the X Factor was criticised for an older woman having gone to the auditions four years in a row and always being rejected. People suggested she may not be mentally stable, others hinted that in fact the programme was behind her repeat visits because it was ‘good TV’. I admit I laughed it off and thought it was just another silly story for publicity.

However, on watching tonight’s show, ‘Bootcamp’, where people had been told at their audition they were through to this stage, things have now changed. Before Bootcamp started the judges actually went back and looked through audition tapes and realised that in fact around 40 or so of those they put through, actually weren’t up to the challenge.

Clearly this is a decision to make ‘good TV’ and cause controversy, but surely it gets to a point where people’s lives and feelings need to be considered somewhat? I’m not an actress, singer, or in any way an entertainments type of person. I do however recognise this sort of industry is tough and people need to be prepared for it.

Getting all those people in front of one another and then humiliating those individuals that for some reason all of a sudden aren’t good enough anymore in my opinion is just not right.

Yes in that sort of industry people have to go through various stages of auditioning, tests, callbacks and more. From my knowledge though they are aware of those stages? They have not been told they’ve reached another stage and then before that stage begins they get cut, without any explanation and without a chance to fight for their place.

Three of the judges are in musical groups – do they not remember how tough it was for them and that one person in their life that gave them a break or a chance? No, it’s all about what outfit to wear this week and how many front covers they can get on ready for next week’s show. As each group is coming on stage what is it they are asking – has anybody had any fights over the song choice! Another group sings and one young boy who they all clearly love has been deemed the stand out of that selection – he was so weak!

Already you can get a good idea of who they are looking at to put through – they are smiling at those people within seconds of them singing, or in some cases as soon as they walk on stage or in the room. Not a very fair competition then in my eyes…

I know X Factor has always been – and likely always will be – a show for entertainment and people have complained about it for a long time. I too am now feeling myself join the camp of being anti this show and understanding although people with talent will also feature in it that’s not what the show’s producers are interested in. They want people who are prepared to be humiliated or one side, or on the other be someone who will allow themselves to be moulded and modelled into the exact robotic replica star Mr Cowell and his team need to make their bank balances even bigger.

My guilty garage pleasure

I arrived home one night last week to find a parcel had been delivered for me, excitedly rushing into my flat I ripped open the packaging to open up the musical purchase I’d ordered online only a matter of days before. A garage CD. And now over a week later I am listening to it. In fact it’s playing on the laptop whilst I type this blog post.

The reason? My boyfriend has been round my flat every evening since then and - although he’ll argue against this point – he really cannot stand garage music. Therefore as he’s just popped out I’ve realised I can now finally get around to treating my ears to my music genre of choice (well one of).

I’m only on track one, but already I am thinking of getting made up, dressed up and getting out to a local bar and club for a night of drinking and dancing. The next track mixes in and I literally get a little flip in my stomach. I am like this nearly every time I listen to garage – whether in my flat, on my mp3 player or in the gym working out.

It’s funny how they say certain senses can trigger memories and feelings within you, and without a doubt music has this effect. I also find I can normally associate different music to different people in my life. In particular, men in my life.

For example, one of the key people that come to mind is one of my first boyfriends – a mixed race guy I met on work experience when I was at school. I remember sneaking to Limehouse to go and meet him with friends on a Saturday afternoon, when I’d tell my trusting parents I was going to look round the shops with school friends in Romford. At this point I guess I was around 14 or so, I’d gone through the phase of listening to more pop style tracks, the Britpop/Indie era and doing dance routines to boybands, by now I was discovering more urban music and this ‘love of my life’ was the guy who got me into R&B.

I still have my first ever Smooth Grooves album by Kiss 100, I would religiously listen to the CD over and over and even now I haven’t tired of many of the songs on there.

As I started to go out in the evenings my tastes expanded again, we were under 18 but like everyone else in school and college liked to go out in our local area for nights out and indulge in some booze and a good boogie. This is when I enjoyed more cheesy tunes and danced on the floor, tables and stage of our local ‘Jaks’ to 80s classics, singing along, following the moves and generally having fun.

After a while most of us in the group preferred to go to clubs and bars, here I enjoyed my dance music and I guess this is also when I first got into garage. Even now I smile remembering dancing with a particular friend of mine in what we described as the ‘podium’ of our local club. I never seemed to tire, just wanting to dance to every song that came on. I always remember what was once called Time & Envy opening – people on stilts, fire-eaters, fire grinders. Me and some of my close friends would go without fail every week to the club, we knew the DJs, some of the bar staff and we loved the music they played, sometimes now snubbing the venues that played more cheesy tracks.

When I went to University I met one of my closest friends and found we shared similar tastes in music, we often text each other now on hearing a song from those days and reminisce. I also met my previous boyfriend, who happened to DJ when he wasn’t studying at Uni or doing his part time job and I got even more hooked on garage. I’ll be honest the guy treated me like rubbish, but I worshipped the ground he walked on and he liked garage so I soon loved it even more. Thankfully our breakup and bad memories of that relationship haven’t impacted on my musical tastes.

Then more recently – well six years ago – I met my current boyfriend and that involved another expansion in my musical tastes. I started going to gigs – no I really hadn’t been to one before him (ha! Well unless you want to include a Blue concert?...No thought not). I got more into rock music (nothing too heavy mind) and as my boyfriend would argue less ‘chavvy’ music, I absolutely love the Foo Fighters now for example. Before meeting my man I hadn’t ever heard one of their tracks.

There are songs that make me sad, those that remind me of people I’d rather forget, tracks that remind me of nights/people I shall never forget, songs from amazing nights out clubbing with friends and Uni days, people’s weddings…I won’t go on, you get the picture.

When music stars set out on their dreams, I imagine they too obviously have former talent that have inspired them. But with the increasing popularity and general number of TV talent shows – Pop Idol, Britain’s Got Talent and of course X Factor – are we moving into a time where most music sounds the same? People miming, being churned out like factory models who all fit the same mould and will make millions for music moguls such as Mr Cowell?

I’ll admit I do indulge in a bit of X Factor if I happen to be at home and have nothing to do, particularly in the initial episodes where all sorts of people are there to audition. However, we all know if they’re a bit different that even if they get put through at first, throughout the show when they do the themed weeks gradually those with something new to offer will drop like flies.

Of late I’ve noticed though these ‘stars’ aren’t lasting as long in the music world or the charts. Are people starting to rebel? Do they want something different? For instance JLS never won the show and have had huge success. I only read the other day that the excruciatingly annoying (sorry!) Leona Lewis has decided to take her own route and veer away from the Whitney-style warbling she pursued at first.

I think it’s important to have a variety of music out there – so people can expand their musical tastes and develop their own music memories. Over the years just some of the selection I’ve seen live are Kasabian, Oasis, Foo Fighters, Take That, Muse, James Blunt, DJ Luck & MC Neat, Faithless, Kaiser Chiefs, Dizzee Rascal, Scissor Sisters, Alanis Morisette and Blue – a real mix, some at festivals, some at huge arenas, others in University venues or in small scale music halls. What’s more I hope to enjoy an even greater selection moving forwards.

I’m going to continue sitting here indulging in my guilty pleasure now and fight the urge to go out and party instead of staying in saving my money and watching the rubbish on TV.

Perhaps I might even do something I always like to do every once a while and flick through a mixture of songs from past and present that are some of my favourites. Who knows what memories I’m about to come across…

The music of happiness

Sorry everyone, I really did mean to blog yesterday, but unfortunately the M1 was against me.

Last night I went to see the almighty Foo Fighters at Milton Keynes Bowl, their amazing set finished around 1030pm or so. However, leaving was not so easy, we got back to the car around 11 or so and managed to get out the car park about midnight. Then began the lovely journey home. What should have taken around 1hr 10 or so, actually resulted in us reaching my little flat gone 4am.

If it wasn’t for my man finding an escape off the M1, following random A roads and ignoring the sat nav’s insistence to rejoin it, I imagine we would have got home a lot lot later.

So there you have my excuse for not blogging – I was in no fit state to start typing at that time. Trying to go to sleep as the birds started singing was not ideal, granted this would have been a common occurrence when I was younger, but nowadays I normally get in around 2am latest from any of my nights out.

Anyway, as I was saying the gig was great – a really good set, they played a whole host of hits and what topped it all off was the likes of Roger Taylor, the drummer from Queen and Alice Cooper joining them on stage at various points. Oh and the cool firework display as they left the stage.

I genuinely thoroughly enjoyed myself and I felt so happy last night as I stood amongst thousands of people all there to rock out to Mr Dave Grohl and his talented band. Weird I know to start judging your life when you’re at a music concert meant to relax you and forget all your troubles. Maybe it was the beer or wine I’d consumed? Who knows. But I felt so happy yesterday, the relief at having handed my notice in and having a new job to go. Feeling that weight off my shoulders, I jumped around like a nutter and really let my hair down and I felt really close to my man too. I felt like the old me, ready to take on a new chapter in my life.

One thing that the Foo Fighters did mention a number of times and I recall also bringing up at the Isle of Wight, was how they have been going so long and on their natural talents as a rock band – no sound effects or computers, they play as they are with good old fashioned instruments. So does that make them any better than any other music out there?

To me, I think there is no question how talented they are and what a great show they put on, their tracks are all fabulous and never fail to entertain. However, for me music is about a number of things and mainly how it makes you feel – does a song have the power to make you cry, make you feel overwhelmed with happiness, or fill you with so much energy you just want to go out and get on the dancefloor there and then?

Why do people often argue that unless music artists use traditional methods to play they’re cheating in some way and the music isn’t as valid or of genuine quality? I like a mix of music, some of which are much to my boyfriend’s distaste. I like rock, I like garage, I like R&B, I like cheesy chart hits and pop, dance music, popular club tracks, 80s cheese, 60s legends, Indie acts and I also like random talent by lesser known artists that I may not have experienced before. The only music I’d say I don’t really enjoy right now is classical; it’s never really been something I’ve been into. Knowing me though someone will introduce it to me at some point and I’ll start liking that too!

It’s funny, I’ve realised a lot of the music I’m into has been introduced to me at some stage by people in my life and those around me definitely have a strong influence on my musical interests.

To me music is about how it makes the audience feel and how they achieve this is up to them, it’s important to evolve and try new tactics. However, as the saying goes if it aint broke don’t fix it!

All I know is last night I was lucky to experience a band whose career has spanned 16 years for about the fourth time in my life and I hope I get to many more times. For now it’s off to a family get together and then off to see Robbie and the boys at the Take That concert at Wembley on Tuesday. Told you my musical taste was varied!